Strength After Fear

So yesterday was a bad day, but guess what? Life goes on! Today, I feel far better than I did yesterday, simply because I prayed last night that God would give me the strength to do what is best or me. I prayed not for what I wanted to do, or what might make me feel good, but what was best for me. I felt exhausted as I let those words slip from my mouth, but I already feel so much comfort and relief. Asking for God's plan to be fulfilled can be scary, because deep down we know that what we want may not line right up with what God wants. Once we come to realize that God's plan is ultimately more perfect than we could ever imagine...it becomes much simpler. Trying to fight against the will of God is tiring. It wears us down until we have nothing left within ourselves but a desire to know God. That desire can get bogged down by all kinds of things that are a part of our flawed world. I know yesterday, I had a moment of pure anger and fear and I shoved my bible from my bed and said "Enough of this!" and I felt defeated and cried until all I could do was talk to God about it. I felt guilty for what I had said and felt, but God understood. We cannot always understand His way. We simply have to believe and keep faith, and when we do, all of His work becomes so clear to us within our own lives.

I have tons of things to be stressed over. However, I feel calm knowing that God has it under control. I believe with all of my heart that things happen for a reason. It's true that what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, and we must praise God through our struggles, not after them. The choices that bring us the most fear always bring us the most strength. We just have to stay positive! God is always with us, and so we should be fearful of nothing. He will take care of it. We should be thankful for our trials. They help shape us, and I am grateful for how mine are shaping me.

On a side note, Gracie is getting huge! She's 16.5 pounds now, a total chubster. She is full of so much energy still that she tires me out, but I am too blessed to have her. Every morning she makes me smile when she runs up, fiercely wagging her tail, and looking up at me with her dark eyes. She's honestly the sweetest gift God could have ever given me. I guess it's probably about time for a picture :)

She's my sweet girl. Cuddles with her mama.

But always find reasons to smile, even when you go through a gray period like I did. Yesterday was rough, to say the least, but today I feel completely renewed. Everything will be alright, I promise.